Chicken Fried Bacon
Continuing the fine traditions of stupid American Cooking embodied by the Luther Burger, m’learned friend Range Rover Wrecker Matt brings to my attention the concept of “chicken fried bacon”. “Chicken fried” seems to be some sort of stupid US slang for the process of deep frying something coated in breadcrumbs; its usually done to tenderised steak, so you end up with something similar to a Wiener Schnitzel.
However, as visionary Glen Kusak, winner of the State Fair of Texas “best taste” award notes:
Everything in Texas is chicken fried and bacon makes everything better so we thought we’d put the two together
So what does it look like? Watch this. Pay close attention to the onion rings at around 1:05 into the video, and the chicken fried bacon itself appears at 1:30.
Yes, that’s right: they are battering and deep frying bacon now. And they have onion rings big enough to serve as a makeshift belt, presumably because your heaving gut just broke the one you wore on your way to the diner. That’s doubly convenient! I have to try this. Quick! To the intercontinental conveyancing device! No need to pack — we’re not going to fit in these clothes when we’re done anyway!
chicken up that bacon boy!
Did you notice it was only old people in the clip eating the death strips? maybe the texan younglings arteries are just not up to the challenge!
If there’s any validity to the survival of the fittest, Texans won’t make it into the 23rd century.
Hmm, thing is, there is no evolutionary pressure on fat people. Nothing to cull them from the gene pool before reproduction. Clearly, the answer is the inforced reintroduction of large numbers of carnivores to North America. Cougars, lions, tigers, bears; that sort of thing. That would be expensive though, so to fund the operation it’ll need to be filmed. I bet Fox would lap up the TV rights to “Fast Animals, Slow Texans”.